Mumaleary's Blog

Cheaper than therapy

This Summer I will mainly be #ProudinmyBikini

on July 8, 2015

Last month a hashtag was doing the rounds on Facebook and Twitter set up by the blogging beauty that is Vicki from Honest Mum.

Now, I had always considered her type of honest and mine to be poles apart, her children are immaculate, her hair is frankly immense  (in the best possible way) and her writing, blogging and film making experience are the stuff my dreams are made of.
In short, if this were school she would definitely have rolled with the cool kids. I felt- through absolutely no fault of hers, that she was out of my league- a genuine successful grown up whilst I, approaching 35, am still struggling to figure most of this stuff out.

One evening, home alone, I was scanning my twitter feed and came across Vicki’s original #proudinmybikini post.
She was literally laying herself bare (short of a gorgeous red bikini) and saying this is me, I’m a mum of 2 and I’m proud to be me in my bikini.

#proudinmybikini

Look at that hair!!!
Gorgeous.

In the post (which as now been seen by over 70,000) Vicki was asking for other mums to share their bikini pics.

Wow- didn’t that redress the balance.

Isn’t it ridiculous that it should even be a big deal…but it was and it is because it seems that we women are always so keen to imagine that other people are doing so much better than we are…

Better mums- because they’re working or not working or combining the two.
Better wives- because they don’t burn water or whatever
Better species because…We imagine…that beneath their jeans they don’t have the bit of belly that gets tucked into their knickers (which no doubt match with their bra- which they no doubt peel off each night before a mammoth session with the husband!)

It is a fantasy fed by stupid magazines and also by social media.

Women are too fat or too thin, too vain or too unkempt.

We’ve lost our sense of perspective and also of giving ourselves and others a break.

This week The Sun posted what I’ll loosely refer to as ‘an article’ on their social media entitled “17 people that look worse in a bikini than you do.”
How cruel- who made them or indeed any of us judge and jury?

I love #proudinmybikini. It is an amazing look behind the curtain into the fact that we are all normal people.
No one is perfect and no one is without their own hang ups and flaws and, by sharing them we become a little bit more real and help everyone else breathe a little easier.

Prior to this campaign the last time I’d properly worn a bikini was over  years ago on our fabulous baby moon in Marrakesh. Pregnant bikini
I absolutely love the picture- check out how happy I am- over the moon to be carrying our precious daughter (didn’t know that she was a she at the time) and loving the relaxing sunny break with my husband.

Since then I’ve had 2 beautiful baby girls and the boobs and bump have headed somewhat south.
I’d like to say that the change in my body didn’t affect me but, in the spirit of being honest I’ve got to say that after a particularly nasty labour and a tricky recovery my confidence was well knocked, the stomach stretched and sagged and my fitness and body confidence plummeted. It has  taken quite a lot for me not to well up when I saw myself undressed. Incredibly self indulgent I know- but there it is.
Lots of little things have helped me get my mojo back but one of the most significant has definitely been this campaign.
Following on from the tweets UKSwimwear sent me a couple of the mums who took part in the campaign some bikinis to review and I was lucky enough to be one of them. They are absolutely gorgeous- I LOVE THEM.
I can not wait to wear them in the paddling pool, at the swimming pool and finally, on our holiday in Tuscany.
They are my way of sending a messsage to my girls that say:

We are more than the way we look
Be kind to your body- it is the only place you have to live.
Your spirit and kindness are visible whatever you are wearing and whatever your size
Don’t judge other people (at least not on appearances)
Don’t waste your energy on people that are judging you and…importantly
Nautical is always, always on trend!

I’ve written plenty of times about promoting a positive body image for my daughters but actions speak louder than words so here goes…

Channelling the 1950's vibe.

Channelling the 1950’s vibe.

MY FAVE!! Maryan Mehlhorn Nautical Bikini

MY FAVE!!
Maryan Mehlhorn Nautical Bikini

To me, bring Proud in your Bikini this summer is more than the act of wearing a bikini it is the decision to like yourself a bit more whatever you are wearing and to embrace the idea of kindness and support for yourself and others.

I hope that this post makes you breath a little easier.

Happy Summer Everyone!

Loads of love,

Muma.

XxxX

love-your-body-and-be-healthy

I am linking up with Honest Mums #BrilliantBlogPosts you can click the link to see what other bloggers have been up to this week!

Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

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24 responses to “This Summer I will mainly be #ProudinmyBikini

  1. moderatemum says:

    My one regret about my pregnancy was not going on a beach holiday! I think it would have been the only time that I woudn’t have been self conscious on the beach! You look wonderful in all three pictures x

    • Mumaleary says:

      Thank you so much- it is so weird and wonderful to have so many people saying such nice things!
      Our baby moon was so so lovely, would encourage anyone to do it. X

  2. You look great! Seriously! Isn’t it funny how we are always so much harder on ourselves than others perceive us. I wouldn’t wear a bikini as I genuinely do look pregnant even though I’m not and I’m very careful about how I dress to disguise that part of my figure but I think it is still an awesome campaign #brilliantblogposts

    • Mumaleary says:

      Thank you for your kind words- it is a brilliant campaign and one that transepts the bikini I think- it is, for me, about being a little bit more honest and real so people aren’t conned into trying to ‘keep up with the Jones’ when actually we are probably all pretty similar behind closed doors.
      X

  3. Thank you so much for sharing this! Your post is wonderfully honest and I think just about everybody (even models though we don’t really believe them) feels they have wobbly-bits. Well done you for putting your photo where your words are to be an inspiration to your girls! And you look absolutely smashing in ALL your photos! #brilliantblogposts

    • Mumaleary says:

      Thank you so much.
      I was so nervous but I think it is so important to try and make sure you aren’t sharing hang ups with your children…they’ll get their own without needing ours too!

  4. You look fab!! 🙂

  5. Wow! You look great on both bikinis! Halter neck is definitely your style!
    We’re absolutely happy we have met and get to work together! It’s been a pleasure. Look at you! You’re going to rock in your holidays!
    Huge thanks 🙂 xx

    • Mumaleary says:

      Thank you so much, I was made up with the bikinis- totally up my street and excellent quality. Love them. Can’t wait for the holiday now but actually we are going to a wedding this weekend and the hotel has a pool…whoop whoop!!

  6. Aaaah I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this!!!!!!

    Well done Vicky for posting her pic and coining the hashtag in the first place — she’s such an inspirational blogger, I love her to bits — but WELL DONE to you for following suit!! You look amazing in the first pic, with your beautiful baby bump. But equally amazing in the others too!!

    I was always a little embarrassed of my shape — I have HUGE legs and big hips and bottom — but my body is strong — it works — and best of all, it housed my twins for 8 months! We should be so proud of ourselves! xxx #BrillBlogPosts

    Caro | http://www.thetwinklediaries.co.uk

    • Mumaleary says:

      Yep, Vicki hit the nail on the head didn’t she! We should absolutely be thinking of what our bodies can do- they grow tiny people for crying out loud and that is pretty amazing!! x

  7. You Baby Me Mummy says:

    Wow you look amazing! Well done for sharing, but you do look incredible x

  8. Emma says:

    Great post. I think we all feel other mums are doing it better, being more confident and have got it under control. You look great in your bikini. I was lucky after my son that my body bounced back but I am now 40 weeks pregnant with number 2, have stretch marks I never had before and a v.big bump and already wondering how I will feel about my mummy tummy.

    • Mumaleary says:

      EEEK- How exciting!!! Best of luck with the new baby. LOVELY STUFF. I am sure you will get your head around your new shape and hopefully this campaign reminds you that we are all in the same boat. Be kind to yourself. Thank you for commenting. x

  9. 2askews says:

    You look so great, well done brave lady! Maybe I should check out UK swimwear too and find my brave inner self. Love reading your honest words keep them coming!

    • Mumaleary says:

      I would absolutely recommend you check them out- excellent range, price points and super fast delivery (and fee returns!)
      Thanks for your kind words- the writing is my therapy! x

  10. Honest Mum says:

    This post brought tears to my eyes.

    You look stunning, an absolute knockout, in all the photos, and I’m honoured you have joined in with #proudinmybikini, I still can’t believe the effect it has had, it’s my proudest moment blogging and it was the scariest when I hit publish too (although I honestly only thought my folks would comment)!

    Women need to know we all have a right to feel good in our skin and that means all sizes, stretchmarks or not and shapes… you are spot on, this was always about promoting confidence and strength and together we can show the traditional media what real beauty looks like, this has raised the hairs on my arms, thank you xxx

    P.S I was the misunderstood rebel at school, I was pretty cool at sixth form and uni though hehe 😉

    • Mumaleary says:

      Thanks a million Vicki- I am not at all surprised you are proud of this campaign- it has touched so many people and continues to do so. Absolutely brilliant.
      It has made me look at other women in a different way. We don’t know each others journeys, we don’t know each others history and we have no right to judge but we can be an incredible support if we can just open up and be honest. xx This is an amazing start. X

  11. Colette B says:

    You look fab. I do love the message behind #proudinmybikini – I’ve never been a bikini girl and I never well be. It’s not about a lack of confidence (though my three times pregnant, cut open and breastfeeding body will never look fabulous) its actually just that I’ve never been a bikini girl. I prefer the security of a one piece – my boobs are less likely to escape!!

  12. Messed Up Mum says:

    Wit woo hot momma! You are bloody beautiful! Love this message, and I love you for promoting it! x

  13. acornishmum says:

    You look gorgeous and rock a bikini! Well done for promoting good body image online and to your daughters, I hate how people bash other’s appearance and how we all end up judging ourselves by someone else.

    Stevie x #brilliantblogposts

    • Mumaleary says:

      WOW- Thanks, that is really kind. Positive body image, positive mental attitude and being kind are I think amongst the most important messages any of us can pass on to our children but it’s hard to live by them all the time isn’t it. x

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