My Facebook feed is clogged up with Mums telling the world what a marvellous Mothers Day they’ve had. How terrific their toddlers have been and all the sunshine and flowers that have filled their days.
That is not what mine looked like.
My Mother’s Day has not followed the traditional formula of being gently woken with a cup of tea and some lovely hand-made cards.
Mr L was stuck between a rock and a hard place. I went out with my besties last night and, based on historical events, the husband felt that what I would like most on Mothers Day was a lie in. Particularly since we’d already had an hour stolen thanks to the whole ‘spring forward into summer’ thing. Annoying. It was a fair guess but (based on historical events) I stuck to beer last night and didn’t go mad as I didn’t want to waste the day feeling retched. Smug is not the word.
So, no tea (given it up for lent), no chocolate (ditto) and, it seems no weeing on my own. Not even on ‘My Special Day’.
I was handed my cards whilst sitting on the throne and only had a cursory glance at my present which was a lonely planet guide to
gods own, Wales. Brilliant.
We delivered my mums presents played there for a bit and then drove to the park.
The car journey which would usually be 10 minutes took the best part of an hour thanks to stupid road works and no diversion. So, at least I had time to look through my book. OMG. Mr L had suggested a day trip and had marked (don’t worry puritans, only with post it’s) possible places for us to head to with a picnic. NOOOOOOO.
He thought, that because I didn’t mention it, I didn’t want to go. Obviously it was too late to make a day of it and we are in stationary traffic with no way out I decide, very practically, to cry about it. Well done Mrs L. Useful.
All of this is happening to a backdrop of 101 Dalmations on CD and the big little calling Muma Muma Muma on a never ending loop and, when I answer as patiently as I can, she says nothing. Aaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh.
Eventually we get to the park and get out. We had decided to try something new today by taking the truck and trike with us to try to reduce the whole carrying carry on…
The little little loves her truck and walks all over he place with it at home. She is so active. Except today. She refuses to walk a solitary step with her truck and instead lies face down on the pavement.
The big little on the other hand is powering ahead with her trike. Excellent. Basically a family day in different time zones!
The first thing we see as we arrive at the park is a beautiful Dalmatian. She is open-mouthed to see one in real life and I begin to feel that things are picking up.
And, following a brain wave I’ll liken to the genius of Alexander Bell, we put the little little in the truck and let the big one push. #WINNING! The picture of my beautiful girls and my lovely family overwhelms me and, guess what, I cry. FFS. Who does that?!
During a wailing interval!
We wear out the swings and have a good old run around and then headed home for the picnic lunch that Mr L had prepared for our day trip 😦 and then, as a treat, decide to head to Parkgate for an ice cream. YUM.
It’s at this point that the whining really steps up a gear. There is wailing because she wants to walk. Wailing because she won’t hold my hand (I’m not a needy parent but near busy roads there are rules!) Wailing because there are people on the wall so she can’t walk on it. Blah blah blah. It is annoying and, when I raise my voice at her I can feel the happy Parkgate public judging the miserable Mother’s Day mum. Hideous.
The idealised picture I had in my brain of us walking along, slurping on our ice creams as the girls chatted and giggled playfully is, quite frankly laughable. I basically downed my (amazing) doubleheader sharing it with two streaming nosed children whilst policing the wall to ensure neither of them plummeted into the marshes below. Not worth the calories if I’m honest. Too much stress today!
Anywho, the day reached its glorious climax when, as I was taking off the big littles shoes she slapped me around the face. WHAT??
Terrible Two’s?! They were today. Please someone give me some advice on how to deal with this brain melting tantrums- quick! They are sending me up the wall and round the bend!
I’m linking this whole miserable post to Katie at Mummy, Daddy, Me’s linky of The Ordinary Moments’ BUT, that doesn’t mean I want this to become the norm!! Just real I guess. 🙂
Happy Bloody Mothers Day.
So, you know I didn’t get shortlisted for the MAD Awards (sob!) you can help raise my self esteem again by nominating me for one of these bad boys instead (if you like)